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You should take your cues from your partner, not from documentaries or this sub, on whether your partner's views and actions are manipulative, brainwashy and damaging. Certainly there are such people in the church, but there are such people in any organization, and I would challenge you to remember that the members are also individuals with thoughts, feelings and the ability to rebel in their own ways.
You will join the church. The two of you can get married in the temple and live together forever for eternity.
Then she can have a chance to actually be the individual she is, and they can have an adult conversation about their future and whether or not they have one.
Anecdotes vs a much larger sample size.